December 30, 2005
December 29, 2005
This chapel in the Palais Des Papes in Avignon is for sale on Ebay for $990,000 (if you don't believe it, go to Ebay>Real Estate>Other). Pinky needs it to start his reign as the challenger pope. (If they could do it back then, why not now?!) Pinky is asking all 990,000 of his followers to send just $1 to Pinky to establish Avignon as the new seat of Pope Pinkus I. Pinky thinks he will look fabulous in his gold embroidered robe and jewel encrusted cowboy hat. You can visit and kiss his ring.
For New Years Eve, Pinky is creating a mashed potato mountain. There will be a luscious river of reduced pear cider and thyme, pork tenderloin mountain lions, and cracker trailer houses blocking the view. Pinky has been peeling potatoes all week. Pinky prays none of the guests are on the Atkins Diet.
December 28, 2005
December 27, 2005
Pinky has hurt Nadine's feelings, so now she is acting like she doesn't have long to live. She has picked out her funerary dress and lays for hours practicing looking dead. Pinky goads her on by coming over and practicing her funeral sermon while eating bags of Cheetos (he knows the orange residue really bothers her, but she tries really hard to keep her eyes closed). He tells her no one will be there except him and the Waxahachie Murphy family.
But he does what it takes. One suggestion to improve his blog visibility was to "shut your fat mouth and show more naked pictures of Miss Love." Well, Miss Love doesn't show skin for free, but she agreed to let Pinky photograph her while she painted a bucolic scene of her miniature zebu. Looks and talent are rare indeed in the same package.
...but he needs you now. Here are the actual #'s of visitors to Pinky's blogsite for the past week. It is hardly worth his effort to spend hours a day for such a small number of viewers. He also spends thousands per month on an obviously bloated and inefficient marketing department. Can your firm or think tank spend some time developing a plan for Pinky to spread his message throughout the world (or at least North Central Texas)? Pinky feels a true dedication to his work here, publishing several posts each day to help the less fortunate. Please help.
December 26, 2005
Pinky went to see Nadine after her week-long binge with the Presbyterian preacher. As expected, she's off her meds and totally stressed out by the holidays. She was in a dirty nightgown making a giant paper mache telephone. Pinky asked her what it was for. She answered, "To call Jesus, of course!" Pinky asked her to put in a good word for him.
December 25, 2005
Data Spectrum Phantom was imaged with a set high resolution collimators, 2 minutes per slice, and a 4 mm patient couch step. The data was then reconstructed with the new fully three-dimensional maximum aposteriori (MAP) reconstruction. 20 slices of the 40 aquired, are displayed with a slice thickness of 4mm. There are about 3 million counts in the rod section of the phantom and 8 million counts in the spheres section. The rod diameter are as follows 4.8mm, 6.4mm, 7.9mm 9.5mm 11.1mm and 12.7. The sphere diameters are as follows 9.5mm, 12.7mm 15.9mm, 19.1mm and 25.4mm, 31.8mm. This clearly illustrates the super high-resolution of the NeuroFOCUS camera.
Damn, what a smelly house! What's all that mooing and scratching? I just dropped down the chimney to leave of a package for Miss Love and a bag of coal for Pinky Diablo, and the computer was on--so I thought I'd let you know how the cow really ate the cabbage. Pinky said he'd help with delivery this year, but he was always off somewhere else with that little pink trailer. He's got the Mrs. wrapped around his little finger. All I hear is, "Pinky this! Pinky that." Well, I say Pinky can go screw himself! There's not one lazy elf I'd trade for 50 Pinkys. And you've never heard such outrageous demands on me as from Pinky all his sheltered f*cking life. When he was 6 he asked for an electric cookie. Now, what in the hell is an electric cookie?! R&D wasted 6 months before I told them Pinky was just trying to get my goat. Now that I think of it, Santa's gonna deposit a special package for Pinky right here on his keyboard. The place is so filthy, he probably won't even notice it. By the way, if you read this before I make it to your place, I've kinda lost my appetite being here, so don't put out the cookies. Porno and scotch would really hit the spot about now. Merry Christmas!--SC
December 24, 2005
If there's no wound on the hand,
that hand can hold poison.
Poison won't penetrate where there's no wound.
There's no evil for those who don't do it.
--Dhammapada, 9, translated by Thanissaro Bhikkhu
Pinky doesn't understand it.
It the wound were big enough,
Wouldn't the poision pour right through,
Leaving the flesh undisturbed?