Dear Jesus, why did God only give me one leg? Did I sin? Why do I have to pay in constant misery for the stupidity of Adam and Eve? Millions of my fellow birds are killed and maimed on windshields, by cats, by avian flu, and 100’s of other calamities. Obviously birds don’t get to heaven, because if they did there would be no room for anything else. Imagine how many birds have lived and died in the history of the world! Why has God forsaken me? I tried to go to church, but was kicked by a nun. I don’t even have an address where you could send a letter, so never mind.