Dame Elizabeth Marchbasket

Famed Dame Elizabeth has agreed to come out of a lengthy seclusion to design the costumes for Pinky's opera, The Zoo Keeper's Lament. Dame Elizabeth was a powerhouse designer in the 1940's .

The Cows and the Peaches: a Little Ditty by Bruce Balentine and Pinky Diablo from 1970

Almost 40 years ago, nine year-old Pinky came up with the idea for a song, and his musician neighbor collaborated with him to create The Cows and the Peaches. It was recorded in 1970 in the Electronic Music Lab at North Texas late one night by Bruce, Jim and Douglas Balentine. Pinky and Bruce are working together on Pinky's latest opera, The Zoo Keeper's Lament. (Still looking for our wealthy patroness!)

Pinky's Bible Stories Continued

Noah's daughter was not amused at the situation.

Monet's Worst Creation Becomes Pinky's Finest!

It's amazing what a little warthog can do for a bad work of art. Try it! (P.S. While all of Pinky's blog pics are taken by Pinky himself, this series is really his.)

Pinky Hates Mr. Monet

(So he's tearing up his Monet book and using the pages for collage.)

Pinky and his Sweet Birdie Have Hit the Road Acting Out Scenes of Hamlet for Adoring Crowds

Note to Jesus

Dear Jesus--Lesson learned! Thanks for bringing the red back to Pinky. (Can you please stop sending Pinky dreams like the one above?)

Welcome to the Pinky Diablo Flatland Zoo

Pinky's Dirty Little Secret

Finally, Pinky has settled with the zoo, and he can now talk about why he left. However, Pinky plans on keeping quiet to protect the bear's feelings.

Pinky's Been Having Zoo Nightmares Again

Pinky's Impending Death

Pinky's planning a simple funeral and a nondescript tombstone. There will be only one marble New Yorker strewn on the marble bedside.

Pinky's Court Artist Created This Image of Pinky's Bovine Adventure

Evil Ruminations

Unlike Miss Love’s cow story from last week, this story doesn’t have a happy ending. But unlike Miss Love’s, there is evil, salvation, and disgusting rumen fluid.

Thursday evening after Pinky and Miss Love had arrived at the State Fair of Texas with their ten zebu, a friend from Louisiana noticed his prize bull was starting to bloat. After a couple of hours of trying baking soda and a tube down his throat into his rumen to relieve the pressure, he was still bloating bigger and bigger like a Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade Balloon gone bad. With directions from a vet over the telephone, one of the cow guys poked a large needle in his left side. The needle was too small and not much air was coming out. The vet suggested blowing a little on the needle to clear it out. This duty fell to Pinky. While waiting for the emergency vet to show up, Pinky blew into the needle every few minutes for over an hour. Of course, when the air hissed out of the needle, so did some rumen fluid. Now the rumen is the first section of the cow’s stomach where food goes and sloshes around a bit, then is regurgitated back up and chewed some more. Pinky kinda likes the smell of that cow’s cud and the natural burps that go along with it. What he didn’t realize was that cud must actually be good compared to what stays in the rumen which can only be described as evil. And by evil he means pure-d demonic hellish hate in gaseous and foamy dribble form. This evil is what Pinky had on his lips for over an hour. As he wiggled the needle around and got it in an especially helpful position, some of this demon sperm would sputter out onto his glasses. He had to hold the needle in place and his fingers were all pruney from this wicked liquid. Later he made Miss Love smell his breath (she didn’t flinch)—but when he made her smell his fingers, she practically swooned with disgust. Several small children also smelled Pinky’s fingers—they will probably recall this smell on their own deathbed.

If Miss Love were telling the story, there would be many descriptive passages about the vet tubing the bull, Pinky’s heroic massage of the stomach at the vet’s direction, and the tears of the owners. But Pinky is less interested in the plot than in his early morning visions. Pinky volunteered to spend the night with the bull, because the owner was too distraught to render more tubing and needling relief if needed through the night. The bull seemed a bit better, and he and Pinky did lots of walking and talking. (Apparently you sleep off the flu, but walk off the bloat.) Pinky found himself lowing to the bull in a soft deep hum which seemed to calm him. About 3AM Pinky went into the stall so he could keep a closer eye on the bull. There was a bare dim light over the hall, but the stall was shadowy and quiet. The wooden slats were painted Pinky’s favorite color of pistachio green. The stall floor was red sand. Pinky sat with the bull’s head on his lap. He realized he had never asked if the bull was tame enough for this. When the bull was standing, Pinky had an odd ant’s eye view of this looming swollen beast. Pinky was stretched out on the floor—head propped against the worn wooden wall.

Then, like an apparition, Carravaggio’s Conversion on the Way to Damascus, popped into Pinky’s head. The similarity between this painting and what he was seeing was uncanny. The horse had become a bull, but the lighting was the same. The distressed bloated bull could at anytime step on him. Pinky just mooed some more and hoped that the bull would continue to deflate. Pinky felt calm and peaceful to know he and the bull were, for the moment, safe.

By dawn, the bull seemed better, but Pinky thinks the evil rumen juice simply got the best of him. By afternoon, the vet had all involved (and visiting artist, Mark Ross) roll the worsening bull on his back to try to shake the evil loose. But sadly, the bull died that afternoon.

Pinky Usually Tries to Stay Out of Politics

The 682nd Eye of God

Another Pinky Zoo Nightmare

Pinky Can't Get the Zoo Out of His Dreams

Illegal Photo

Pinky wasn't supposed to photograph animals behind the scenes at the zoo. Oh, well! What are they gonna do, fire him?!

A Set Designer Sent from Heaven

This morning Pinky awoke to a honking car horn in his rural driveway. As he hurriedly tried to get his pants on and cover his tattoos, a short round woman with a huge beehive hair-do stepped out of the Monte Carlo with a box that could only have been containing a huge wedding cake. It was not a huge wedding cake, however. Miss Alma Bacon, set designer to the stars, had arrived all the way from Cleburne, Texas with the first maquette of many she plans on designing for Pinky's opera, The Zoo Keeper's Lament. (It came complete with miniature spot lights, too!) Can't you just imagine the miniature hippo resting on this golden hay pile serenading the barn rats?! Pinky about wet his pants.

Pinky is Terrified

Pinky has had a premonition that he will become a one-armed zoo keeper. The problem is he only has 4 days left at his zoo keeping gig. He will have to be VERY careful the next few days. Here's a little ditty he painted to deal with his fear.