Yet again, Pinky has divulged secrets of the innermost altar of Odd Fellowship. He will of course be tortured and fined.
September 4, 2005
Pinky Diablo In Odd Fellow Trouble!
Yet again, Pinky has divulged secrets of the innermost altar of Odd Fellowship. He will of course be tortured and fined.
Pinky's Biggest Plan Ever!
Pinky has a plan to help out the evacuees in his area. He's going to create a little "Big Easy" right here in Texas. There have got to be great entertainers, cooks, restaurant managers, riverboat captains, prostitutes, card sharks, interior designers, loan officers, security guards--all needing employment. Pinky is turning his 5 acre ranch into the finest New Orleans style club anywhere. There will be a styrofoam model riverboat on his dried up, dirty stock tank that will take 3 passengers in tiny circles (You mardi-gras float builders, come on out!)--Fine crabcakes and beer--the best jazz--a juke joint out back for those patrons with knives and a hankerin' for a good poker game--and a house trailer full of whores! (already in place!) Pinky D is the best employer a worker could have. Full benefits, weekly employee swim parties, crabcakes and beer to your heart's content. Pinky will be the star of the Sunday gospel brunch complete with back-up choir of angels (the whores of course.)
Pinky Has Psychic Powers!
Pinky feels some serious mojo from the Georgia area. When he holds his hand over Georgia on the atlas, he smells an overpowering scent of peaches. His head fills with the shuffling of sultry, slippered Southern Jeza-Belles. There are ladies there that need Pinky. Does your name start with an "S" ? He see socks, rocks in a box, an aunt with chicken pox, flocks of cocks, and knox unflavored gelatin. If this is you, put your hand on the peach and shout "Halleleujah for Pinky!"
Pinky replies, "Amen, sister!" (You can hear him, can't you, baby?!)
Now scroll down and read the entry about sending me some crayons! Load up the kids, Me-Maw, her lady-friend, and the goat, and head on over to Walmart!
Pinky Diablo's Word of the Day
shrive \SHRYVE\ verb
1 : to administer the sacrament of reconciliation to *2 : to free from guilt
Example sentence: Only the knowledge that Pinky had forgiven her could shrive her of the guilt she felt for not tipping him well for the services rendered.
Did you know? We wouldn't want to give the history of "shrive" short shrift, so here's the whole story. It began when the Latin verb "scribere" (meaning "to write") found its way onto the tongues of certain Germanic peoples, who brought it to Britain in the early Middle Ages. Because it was often used for laying down directions or rules in writing, 8th-century Old English speakers used their form of the term, "scrīfan," to mean "to prescribe or impose." The Church adopted "scrīfan" to refer to the act of assigning penance to sinners and, later, to hearing confession and administering absolution. Today, the noun form of "shrive," "shrift," makes up half of "short shrift," a phrase meaning "little or no consideration." Originally, "short shrift" was the barely adequate time for confession before an execution.
*Indicates the sense illustrated in the example sentence.
Endure One Serious Pink Request
Of course, Pinky and his Oddfellows are helping the hurricane relief, but Pinky himself has a pet project. He is gathering new crayons, colored markers, and colored pencils and packaging them in art kits with paper and other stuff, to deliver to the local shelters housing 1,ooo's of hurricane evacuees. All the kids are stir-crazy and would appreciate something to do. If you know Pinky, you can deliver small boxes of crayons and/or markers directly to him. his parents, or an Oddfellow brother or sister. If you don't know Pinky, his wife has agreed to accept mail at her work address. Please send to:
Dottie Love
Hill College
2112 Mayfield Parkway
Cleburne, TX 76037
One package of crayons is appreciated, but see if you can't get everyone in the office to bring one in!
Call your local Salvation Army, church, temple, Oddfellow Hall, newspaper, or town busy-body, and see what local needs there are. Pinky was fascinated to learn that evacuees have to give up their UNDERWEAR and SOCKS becuase of contamination problems. His local shelter in Ellis County needs NEW UNDERWEAR in all sizes. If Pinky were more of a perv, he would start an UNDERWEAR DRIVE--but has settled on art supplies!
Report on Miss Love's Condition
Miss Love says she feels like she's been hit by a bull after her accident. Actually, most of the bruises she has are from her zebu show last week (where Cubby won best male in show!)
September 3, 2005
Pinky's Grammatical Sex Change
Pinky is considering a grammatical sex change. She has approached several prominent linguists, grammarians, and He/She scholars about this delicate operation. They have all told her she must write as a lady for one full year (with therapy and English hormones) before they will consider the risky surgery. (Many sex changes have resulted in hes and shes becoming its.) Pinky isn't so sure she will go through with all this hulla-ballew. In fact he's positive about it now.
Pinky Diablo Performs the Dans Macabre
This magical performance charmed the citizens of Ponder, Texas at their annual Hay Bale Queen Crowning. Pinky was given the key to the city and honorary citizenship. Pinky reminded the adoring crowd that he waited tables for years at Ranchman's Cafe and that if you were one of the stingy locals that left a nickel as a tip for a nice steak dinner, he was comin' to whoop yer ass!
Pinky Diablo's Childhood Fears Turn into Adult Fears
Pinky D doesn't like to think of deep water under him. This did not keep him from going to Newfoundland recently to chase icebergs--he was just a little queasy imagining the hidden underwater world under him. (In fact two teen-aged boys fell through the sea ice feet from Pinky and Miss Love's cabin earlier that winter.) Pinky and Miss Love kept warm by wrapping in blankets and reading stories of sealers adrift on icebergs and researching local sexual abuse cases perpetrated by the Newfoundland clergy. Even the image of bludgeoned seal pups doesn't bother Pinky as much as the idea of being on an ice cube in a glass of scary water!
Pinky Diablo and His Psychic Twin Lance
Pinky D shown here with his psychic twin Lance Fengate. They are at the circus and have just enjoyed a big plate of deviled eggs.
What do Perle Mesta and Pinky Diablo Have in Common?
A love of HAM. Perle was a firm believer that every social function could be improved by a tasty ham. How right she was! (If you're not familiar with Perle, you owe it to yourself to google her. She was class with a capital C!)
Pinky D Sometimes Shocks Sensitive Constitutions
Here's one of the reactions to the puppet show in his pants, starring the singing grubworm. (Everyone else was delighted! In fact, the applause was thunderous.)
Pink Voices in a Pink Head
If two head are better than one, ten could change the world! Pinky Diablo eagerly awaits the input from all the voices in his head. The problem is he only speaks English and Dutch, so seven of the voices go unanswered. Nonetheless, Pinky loves the cacophonious input.
How Does Pinky Do It All?
Many fans wonder how Pinky does all these blogs. Simple. O.R.G.A.N.I.Z.A.T.I.O.N. Pinky has an immaculately clean control room staffed with starch-shirted attendants. Photographers, copy writers, fact checkers, data entry personel, a manicurist, and a zipper checker work in total silence pandering to Pinky D's every pyschic wish. Tours available every 43rd Tuesday. Call the off-shore cat call center for reservations.
Pinky D's Mini Medical Soap Opera
"From one doctor to another, I know your heart must be really rotten to have such great hair!"
Pinky D: Mechanic to Your Wrecked Soul
Miss Love was in an accident yesterday, and her car was totalled. She's doing fine, but her ample bosom was bruised by the airbag (this was in the area of her secret tattoo!) She told Pinky she didn't trust any mechanic to fix her space-aged, new-fangled, patriotic electric hybrid, so....PINKY TO THE RESCUE! He has been working through the night and almost has the car in better than new condition. It's amazing what he can do with goat pellets, baling wire, and old refrigerator parts. Call on Pinky D for all your spiritual and automotive needs--After all, your soul is like your body's engine!
September 2, 2005
Happy Pink Faces
Pinky D was a happy child. He often entertained himself for hours on end. His favorite pastime was to fold his dirty diaper into a lobster with a sailor's cap. Granny D, Pinky's mother, thought he was a genius. Little did she know how little he would change.
Creation Myth (Kansas School Board Members, Pay Attention, There Will Be a Test)
Here He is on the 4th day creating the creatures of the earth and the birds of the sky. What a craftsman! (But it was the glass eyes from the Garden of Eden HobbyTown that really made them life-like.)
Pinky's Own Stairway to Heaven
Just so you'll know why Pinky is walking down the street babbeling in tongues-- Pinky has started building his own stairway to heaven. However, Pinky's carpenter consultant tells Pinky stairs are no a good first woodworking project. Pinky says, "Back off, Hammerhead, Rome wasn't built in a day!"
Tiny Priest Makes Pinky's Newest Invention Portable
Thanks to the Vatican's new Tiny Cleric Program, Pinky Diablo's portable confessional becomes a reality. Confess your sins at home, in the office, or wherever you commit them. Great party game, too!
Freudian Dreams Made Worse by Singing Grubworm
Pinky dreamed he walked in on his nude grandmother in the shower. His grubworm was sitting on the sink singing a lullaby. Quelle Horreur!
Extreme Pink Sports
Pinky has lost something here. The only problem is he can't tell what (even after he landed).
Pinky Attacked by Cardboard Box in Woods
Some days are just like this. Sucker punched by a friggin' box!
September 1, 2005
Another Pinky Diablo Follower Has a Request for the Politicians of Our Great Country
Let them get on the boats with the rescuers and listen to the cries for help as darkness falls.
A Message from a Pink Fan
Pinky, I’m in tears, too. How 'bout petitioning congress to divert all that FUCKING pork (ie. The 2 bridges to absolutely NOWHERE in Alaska) to the Big Easy cause? All my love. You're my hero.
Help Get This to President Bush: Hurricane Relief
Colonel Pinky has been trying to reach President Bush. Perhaps you can help get this message to Washington: Anyone in Katrina's path taking food or water from anywhere will not be considered looters. It will be referred to as surviving. Anyone taking jewelry, guns, or electronics will be sent to Iraq. All American troops in Iraq will be sent to the Louisiana-Mississippi area at once. The Bush family (including the girls) will be moving back to Crawford where they will be hosting 45,000 hurricane refugees. Laura and Barb Sr. will be cooking. The girls will set up school tents and get back to the basics using chalkboards and real books. Bush will be sent back to finish his National Guard service. This is not meant to be flippant. It is a serious request.
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