January 29, 2008
January 25, 2008
Well, all he knows so far is that there will be a tragic monkey death, a gerenuk chorus, and fabulous sets. He is in negotiations with the world famous GilmerMetcalves to write the score. Pinky is also looking for financial backers, supernumeraries, and trained animals that sing, dance, or jump through flaming props.
January 23, 2008
Pinky would sell his soul to the devil in the flick of an okapi's tail if he could paint dead birds like Jean-Baptiste Oudry. (Fans know of Pinky's passing interest in painting potatoes, but Pinky thinks he could master them without satanic intervention). But Oudry paints dead animals like an angel.
After the tiger escaped from the zoo, zoo officials decided to change direction with that exhibit. They are in negotiations with Pinky to live in this cave and play the part of St. Francis. He would be surrounded by parakeets, puppies and squirrels. Pinky is holding out for a pink robe instead of St. Francis's usual brown number. He would go down on his knees at the top of each hour and hold his hands out where a laser beam would simulate the power of God sending down his stigmata. Pinky also is demanding an hour and a half for lunch and the use of an iPod.
January 17, 2008
January 16, 2008
This is the orange that Pinky plucked from an orange tree in the garden of the Medici Palace in Florence. He felt so guilty, that he had to spread the sin around by feeding pieces of it to his parents, Pableau X and Granny D. (They didn't know until afterwards where this divine fruit came from.) It was blood red on the inside and tasted like it was grown in heaven. As the juice dribbled down his chin, Pinky worried about his mortality.
Pinky has been having crazy nightmares since returning from his Italian tour. Last night he dreamed that the Academy (which houses Michelangelo's David) was filled with pink mud. Pinky walked through it leaving pink mud footprints. As he walked by the huge David, the sculpture farted.
"Italian desserts look like heaven and taste like Scipione Borghese's underpants," quipped Pinky at a formal Vatican state dinner. The pope reportedly then had a pair of Scipione's underwear retrieved from the immense archives of the Vatican's historical collections and passed them around for the dinner guests to smell. There was talk that a special apartment has been painted pink and reserved for Pinky's Italian junkets.
Pinky's finally back from his 4 week tour of Italy. He preached in 17 towns and villages, ate 423 pounds of pasta,and drank 122 bottles of Chianti and 83 and a half bottles of Prosecco. He also decided that he would only look and the bottom 9 inches of any painting over 36' tall. He realized that Italian painters of every period had a toe fetish.