Pinky Diablo wouldn't be himself without color.
October 26, 2005
October 25, 2005
October 24, 2005
Pinky D Moves to Desert Temple
Pinky D has decided to close down Diablo Inc. and move to the desert to meditate until he is enlightened. He should be back by next Wednesday.
Diablo Inc. Moving to New Digs
Pinky is tired of all the assisants, technicians, manicurists, etc. running around his house. Here is the model of the new headquarters of Diablo Inc. that will open soon . Venus, Midlothian, Waxahachie, and Garland are bidding to have this business come to their town. There will be a Vietnamese noodle shop, a thrift store, and a chapel available for workers and visitors.
Journey Through Pinky's Body #4
Down the hatch and into the stomach! Here the various foods gather in big piles awaiting their necessary paperwork and travel visas required for their continued karmic journey through the body. Of course in Pinky's stomach the piles of food are always pink, pretty, and fluffy (you are what you eat).
Body Part Advice: Your stomach is a temple. Feed it accordingly.
Pinky Reenacts Famous Novel
Pinky D talked the neighbors into playing Moby Dick. Pinky was Captain Ahab and the neighbors made a white whale costume around their 1972 Ford pick-up. It was great fun and Pinky got lots of exercise.
October 23, 2005
Pinky Diablo: This Day in History
Oct 23 4004 BC According to calculations by 17th century biblical theologian James Ussher, God creates the heavens and the earth.
Pinky Diablo's Philosophy on Eating
Fewer calories--prettier food. That's how Pinky keeps his trim figure. Pinky spends hours carving melons and radishes for Miss Love's dinner every night.October 22, 2005
A Tour Through Pinky's Body #3
Past the uvula into the esophogus--this is the journey every bite of ice cream Pinky takes makes! You may wonder how Pinky has photographs of all his body. Well, Pinky was left alone in his doctor's office with a colonoscope. Pinky just closed his eyes and swallowed.Pinky's Body Part Advice: Don't swallow it if it doesn't taste good. (Unless it's a medical device, or it's going to make you famous.)
A Tour Through Pinky's Body #2
Past the mouth and on to the uvula. Did you know that uvula means grape in Latin? Pinky's uvula bears a striking resemblance to the Virgin Mary when turned upside down.
Pinky's Body Part Advice: The uvula makes an excellent meditation focus.
October 21, 2005
Listen to Pinky D Drone on for Hours
Order Pinky D's Power of Positive Thinking today. You can hone your mind to the sharpness of Pinky's in only 5 minutes a day. Learn to say, "It's alright to take a nap, I deserve it!" and "Screw work, I'm going to the Waffle House!"
A Tour Through Pinky Diablo's Body #1
Every journey through the body begins at the mouth. Pinky D wags his tongue too much, and years of eating burning pizza have created canyon-like fissures in the surface.
Pinky's Body Part Advice: When not in use, keep your mouth closed. Gape-mouthedness lowers your IQ appearance by 50 points.
October 20, 2005
Pinky Diablo's Baptism Robe on Display at Baylor Student Center
Thousands of pilgrims camped on the Baylor lawn to see the miraculous robe. Pinky sold the crowd lemonade and Pinky D t-shirts, but they thought he was the village idiot. How could they tell in Waco?
Pinky D Has New Goat Named Elvis
Pinky D and Miss Love have a new goat named Elvis. Here is the new goat pavillion Pinky built in his dream. Elvis L.O.V.E. loves it.
Torture Still Taking Place in Iraq
Saddam or no Saddam, hundreds of thousands of Pinky's people are still being tortured and murdered in chicken prisons all over the country. Please help Pinky bring the killers to justice. October 19, 2005
The Evil Eye of Satan
Luckily Satan's vision isn't as good as Pinky's. With Pinky on the lookout, you're sure to keep the devil away.
Pinky Diablo's Warning to the World
Pinky will be making the merry-go-round spin faster. He recommends that you hold on tighter to avoid being thrown into the jaws of awaiting demons.October 18, 2005
Pinky Feeling Bellicose
Pinky was feeling a bit punchy. Then he looked up in the night sky and saw the Red Planet by the full moon. Stand back! Pinky's itching for a fight! 
Pink Herkules and the 13th Labor
One: Kill the Nemean Lion
Two: Kill the Lernean Hydra
Three: Capture the Cerynian Hind
Four: Capture the Erymanthian Boar
Five: Clean the Augean Stables
Six: Kill the Stymphalian Birds
Seven: Capture the Cretan Bull
Eight: Capture the Horses of Diomedes
Nine: Take the Girdle of the Amazon Queen Hippolyte
Ten: Capture the Cattle of Geryon
Eleven: Take the Golden Apples of the Hesperides
Twelve: Capture Cerberus
Thirteen: Root a Cutting of the Yellow Rose of Texas
Pink Bower Bird Discovered in Pinky's Backyard
New species of Bower Bird discovered in Central North Texas. The usual colouring of the male Satin Bower Bird is a spectacular deep almost navy blue that shines with a satin like sheen, hence the name. The new species is a Pink Bower Bird. The male builds a nest on the ground that is actually a bower of twigs and small branches and dances around his territory to call his mate. He adorns his bower with pretty things, such as drinking straws and even clothes pins, especially if they are a pink colour.
October 17, 2005
Pinky's Family Goes Back to the Garden of Eden
Like all families, Pinky can trace his ancestry back to the Garden of Eden. The difference with Pinky is that his ancestor was the snake. If you know Pinky personally, you know this is truth. Can Pinky hear an Amen! from the peanut gallery?
Pinky Had to Eat It
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One of Pinky's lady friends brought him a casserole. It would have been rude not to eat it. Pinky is not feeling well again.
Your Secret's Safe with Pinky
Pinky has a few friends who are taggers. But Pinky will never tell. What a friend we have in Pinky.
Pinky Diablo, This Day in History
After the French Revolution began, Marie-Anoinette, queen consort of Louis XVI, was targeted by agitators who, enraged by her extravagance and attempts to save the monarchy, ultimately guillotined her on this day in 1793.
Come to Pinky's Diablo's Day Spa
Debloat with Pinky D's patented vacuum seal skin treatment--Pink-n-Shrink. 
October 16, 2005
Pink Cabinet of Curiosities
“Learned gentlemen should build a goodly, huge cabinet, wherein whatsoever the hand of man by exquisite art or engine has made rare in stuff, form or motion; whatsoever singularity, chance, and the shuffle of things hath produced; whatsoever Nature has wrought in things that want life and may be kept; shall be sorted and included.” --Pinky Diablo
Pinky D Has An Enormous Responsibilty
This is the oracle that Pinky D must care for. He cannot tell you where it is, but it helps him with his psychic work. Pinky writes questions on strips of raw bacon and pokes them into the oracle. A positive answer creates a sweet smelling saffron smoke from the oracle. A negative answer results in a putrid steaming spray of sickening sludge. Pinky hates cleaning up after a negative answer so much that he rarely consults the oracle.Pinky D is a Fine Chef
Pinky D is the IOOF cook for Monday night lodge meetings. He often tries new recipes, and prides himself on running a spotless kitchen. Here is a photo of a recent sit-down dinner for 18 that he catered for a friend.
October 15, 2005
How to Appeal to the Complaint Department of Diablo Inc.
Do you feel you have been unfairly characterized in a Pinky Diablo posting? Many of you have. Now you have the ability to appear before Pinky's Complaint Review Committee. Pinky has assembled the sternist jurists, educators, and business professionals to hear your complaint and then judge in favor of their employer. E-mail Pinky for the 273 page PDF file titled Application for Defamation Form 361-b. Best of luck with your complaint.
No Home Complete Without an Altar to Pinkness
Pinky Diablo has a special offer for you today only. For $79.95 + shipping, handling and prayer charges, you can own a complete altar to Pinkness. Altar is easily put together and contains an autographed photo of Pinky to start your worship of the pink in your life.
Pinky Diablo, Obsessed with Death #92 and Word of the Day
tontine \TAHN-teen\ noun: a joint financial arrangement whereby the participants usually contribute equally to a prize that is awarded entirely to the participant who survives all the others.Example sentence: When all the participants in the tontine but one were murdered, you can guess who the primary suspect was.
Did you know? Tontines were named after their creator, a Neapolitan banker named Lorenzo Tonti. In 1653, Tonti convinced investors to buy shares in a fund he had created. Each year, the investors earned dividends, and when one of them died, his or her share of the profits was redistributed among the survivors. When the last investor died, the capital reverted to the state. Louis XIV of France used tontines to save his ailing treasury and to fund municipal projects, and private tontines (where the last surviving investor — and subsequently his or her heirs — got the cash instead of the state) became popular throughout Europe and the U.S. Eventually, though, tontines were banned; there was just too much temptation for unscrupulous investors to bump off their fellow subscribers.
Delicate Artwork Softens Pinky's Hardened Heart
Local sculptor Nadine recently carved an alabaster elephant foetus that is both precious and haunting. On a local cable access interview with art historian Pinky Diablo, she was asked how she carves with such lifelike precision. Nadine matter-of-factly answered, "I'm God." She then smote the cameraman and disappeared in a cloud of cumin-smelling smoke. Pinky was left with 28 minutes of dead air time.
Pinky Diablo Builds World's Tallest Pee Platform
Pinky, like every red-blooded American man, loves to pee outside. He now has a huge tower from which to pee. You may certainly not use his, but he will send you free blueprints so you can make your own.
Pinky Learns Origami
Pinky's first attempt was to recreate his sidekick. All that's missing is a tiny origami microphone.
October 14, 2005
Pinky Falls in Love
Today at the gourmet grocery store parking lot, Pinky was struck by how good his shadow looked. Now Pinky isn't like Narcissus-- he hates the fat balding cowboy that peers back at him with puffy narrow eyes while he's shaving. But his shadow was different. It was like the real him--the essence of him--Pink Personified. He ran to the temple and asked the monk, "My shadow seems like an empty shell and the true me. Can my shadow love me as much as I love it?" The monk answered simply by bowing before Pinky and saying, "I know not, Master."
Pinky Practices Giving
One of Pinky's lovely ladies has sent him some pink images. Giving to Pinky is one one the foundation stones on which Pinky's philosophy is based. However, Pinky feels it is his duty as a spiritual mentor to turn the giving into another gift. Therefore he is graciously sharing this lovely image with the world. If you see this, continue the gift-giving by forwarding this post to someone who can learn from this important lesson (which is, that in heaven, there are no toilet paper racks--only toilet paper angels.)
October 13, 2005
Pinky Diablo, Obsessed With Death #91
(From New York Times article) FRANCES GLESSNER LEE, a Chicago heiress, provided for just about every creature comfort when she fashioned 19 dollhouse rooms during the 1940's. Miniature corpses — bitten, hanged, shot, stabbed and poisoned — are slumped everywhere. The furnishings show signs of struggles and dissolute lives; liquor bottles and chairs have been overturned; ashtrays overflow. Mrs. Lee, a volunteer police officer with an honorary captain's rank whose father was a founder of the International Harvester Company, used her ghoulish scenes to teach police recruits the art of observation. She called her miniatures the Nutshell Studies of Unexplained Death, after a saying she had heard from detectives: "Convict the guilty, clear the innocent, and find the truth in a nutshell." At her thousand-acre estate in Bethlehem, N.H., she set up a workshop called the Nutshell Laboratories. The first woman to become a member of the International Association of Chiefs of Police, she noticed how often officers mishandled evidence and mistook accidents for murders and vice versa. After endowing a new department in legal medicine at Harvard, she created the Nutshells as classroom tools, packing them with tiny but detectable clues: lipstick smears on a pillowcase, a bullet embedded in a wall. "The inspector may best examine them by imagining himself a trifle less than six inches tall," she suggested in her curriculum notes. The Nutshells now reside at the office of the Maryland state medical examiner in Baltimore, where they are still used in seminars. The pint-size death scenes share the hall with enlarged copies of technical articles with headlines like "Suicide Using a Compound Bow and Arrow" and "Pathogenesis of Vertebral Artery Occlusion."
Mrs. Lee based her tableaus on true stories, but changed the names of victims, suspects and witnesses. The pseudonyms sound ominous: Homer Cregg, Wilby Jenks, Sergeant Moriarty. She also gave each diorama a creepy name: Burned Cabin, Unpapered Bedroom, Dark Bathroom. Some of the furniture was store-bought, made by companies like TynieToy. Other objects were fashioned by Mrs. Lee, who was adept at turning jewelry charms into tchotchkes and straight pins into knitting needles. A carpenter built the dioramas, adding back stairwells and yards even though students would barely be able to see them. Before contorting the dolls into their death throes, Mrs. Lee lovingly knitted stockings and beaded moccasins for them.
Mrs. Lee's own motivations are the subject of some speculation. Was she trying to subtly draw attention to domestic violence, then a neglected subject? Was she escaping the stifling conventions for wealthy women of her time?
Jennifer Doublet of Los Angeles, an architect who has written a scholarly essay on Mrs. Lee, said this week in an e-mail message: "For me there is perhaps nothing more satisfying in the Nutshells than the subversive pleasure of seeing the world of male detectiving blown wide apart by the macabre depiction of domestic violence in the precious, controlled, female space of a doll's house."
Or was Mrs. Lee rebelling against the opulent interiors of her childhood? She grew up in a fortresslike Chicago mansion designed in the 1880's by the Romanesque Revival architect H. H. Richardson. It is now a museum called Glessner House. Her parents, John J. and Frances Macbeth Glessner, sent their son, George, to Harvard but wouldn't let their brilliant, imperious daughter attend college. In 1898, at age 20, Frances married a milquetoast law professor named Blewett Lee. Three children and 16 years later, they divorced. The future Captain Lee retreated to New Hampshire, where she dabbled in antiques dealing. George introduced her to a Harvard-trained medical examiner named George Burgess Magrath. His gruesome casework intrigued Mrs. Lee, who once wrote in a letter, "This has been a lonely and rather terrifying life."
In addition to underwriting a department at Harvard that hired Dr. Magrath, Mrs. Lee organized lavish parties during its criminology seminars. An $8,000 set of dinnerware was set aside for this event at the Ritz-Carlton for crowds of adoring policemen, who gorged themselves on caviar, foie gras and filet mignon. "She gave hours of careful consideration to the seating arrangements, to the floral decorations and to the program," wrote Erle Stanley Gardner, the author of the Perry Mason mysteries, in a 1962 obituary about Mrs. Lee.
Can You Really Know Who You Are When So Much Has Been Kept From You?
Pinky has made another earth shattering discovery about his early childhood. While purusing some old letters from Granny D to friends, Pinky discovered a religious background he was unaware of. Pinky and family lived in Morrocco for a year when Pinky was two. Here is an excerpt from one of the abovementioned letters:"The two older ones are going regularly to Sunday School, Navy sponsored, so it's of a Protestant flavor, but very non-commital and rather dull, I think. Pinky is not old enough to go to church so R'kia is bringing him up as a good Moslem, which I know will meet with your approval."
This explains why Pinky is all over the board religiously. This week he is studying Buddhism.
Pinky Shares Egyptian Business Etiquette
Egyptians love Pinky. He is being courted by several Egyptian agents for appearances, book deals, and arranged marriages. Here are some of the tips he has learned dealing with his new fan base:
--Arabic is read from right to left and books or magazines start at what would be the last page in the U.S. Printed literature should have an impressive back cover, even if printed in English.
--Frequently appointments are interrupted by phone calls and visits from friend and family.
--Business cards should be printed in English on one side and Arabic on the other.
--Documents should carry two dates, the Gregorian (Western) date and the Hijrah (Arabic) date.
Imagination is a Gift from God
Pinky is cleaning house, cooking stew, and emailing students all while wearing what he had on when he woke up: faded black cotton briefs and one very dog hair covered sock hanging off about 4 inches past his toes. He is using this extra flap of sock to dust the baseboards.
Important Archeological Study Ruined By Pinky's Voracious Appetite
While excavating an ancient Chinese settlement, Pinky Diablo discovered a small pile of well-preserved noodles after turning over an upside-down clay bowl. The bowl was buried beneath 10 feet of sediment in Lajia, a small community located by the Yellow River in northwestern China that was destroyed by an earthquake about 4,000 years ago. The thin yellow noodles were about 20 inches long and resembled La-Mian, a type of traditional Chinese noodle made by grinding wheat to make dough and then repeatedly pulling and stretching the dough by hand. Pinky D ate them all before scientists could research them further. He is not feeling well.Pinky D's Word of the Day
harangue \huh-RANG\ noun1 : a speech addressed to a public assembly
2 : a ranting speech or writing
3 : lecture
Example sentence: Pinky Diablo's famous pink coconut harangue pie spouts out a barrage of verbage when sliced.
Did you know? In Old Italian, the noun "aringo" referred to a public assembly, the verb "aringare" meant "to speak in public," and the noun "aringa" referred to a public speech. "Aringa" was borrowed into Middle French as "arenge," and it is from this form that we get our noun "harangue," which made its first appearance in English in the 16th century. Perhaps due to the bombastic or exasperated nature of some public speeches, the term quickly developed an added sense referring to a speech or writing in the style of a rant (though the word "rant" is not etymologically related). There is also a verb "harangue," which refers to the act of making such a speech.
Cousin It Visits Pinky D
Pinky D took Cousin It to Luskey's Western Wear in Fort Worth and got him outfitted for his stay in Texas. They then went to see the famed Phillip Johnson designed water gardens.
October 12, 2005
Miracle Upon Miracle
In Pinky's World There is Only One Deadly Sin
The only deadly sin as far as Pinky is concerned is Slothfulness. The only virtue--Obsession. Pinky is on a one way trip to Hell. Pray for Pinky.
Cutlery Condundrum Solved
These rules weren't made to be broken. If you want to incur the wrath of God (and the distain of Pinky), go ahead and switch the soup spoon and the salad fork. You might as well leave the paper wrapper on the Whataburger when you serve the main course. (Did you know that Pinky was born in Corpus Christi, TX-- home of the Whataburger?)
We are Made in His Image
Since we are made in His image, Pinky wonders what His supper club is like. You probably wonder what Pinky's supper club is like.
Pinky D Brand Coffee
Wake up to the smell of fresh brewed pink coffee. It's like kissing a caffeinated angel.
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October 11, 2005
A Sad Little Pinky Story
This must be Pinky's other psychic twin. (would that make them psychic triplets?) Pinky Diablo Starts Contemporary Dance Troupe
Well, Ok--it's not so new. (But Pinky can rehash the seventies as good as anyone.) The dancers will be dressed like viruses and undulate to the rhythm of a heartbeat (provided by realtime by an actual patient in a heart ward). After they run around for a while, Pinky will ride in on a spray-painted pink shetland pony and shoot the viruses with a sling shot. They will writhe artistically before rolling off stage left. Pinky will dismount and bow to thunderous applause.
"Instruments of Torture: Symbolic Genitalia in Old English Hagiographical Texts."
Pinky D has been kindly asked by an acclaimed medieval researcher to scour the English countryside for long lost items to illustrate her newest book. This branding device was discovered on the bottom of Mrs. Pimsdale's tea kettle in Shropshire. Pinky had a lovely chat with the widow Pimsdale.Mortification Piled Upon Disgust
For those following Pinky closely, Pinky has realized that his Obsessed with Death #87 was responsible for the women's hygiene ads from Google. You would be better off not re-reading that post in this context.
Pinky Diablo T-Shirts Available Soon
Pink t-shirts with Pinky's logo will be for sale by the end of the month. Save your pennies. They will cost $15 in person, $20 over the internet. (Pinky realizes that $5 for mailing a t-shirt is steep, but have you ever seen a cat trying to wrap a package?) Pinky will provide contact information when the shirts are available. Purchase of shirt will legally imply membership in Pinky Diablo's spiritual organization. All rules and regulations will be enforced.
Pinky D Sees God
God appeared in vision and told Pinky to continue his mission. Pinky said it was awe inspiring and similar to a miracle.Miss Love to Leave for Madagascar
Miss Love has heard rumor of an elusive miniature pink zebu herd in Madagascar. She is leaving tomorrow with an empty suitcase in which to bring back a breeding pair.
Pinky Diablo: Photographer to the Angels
How Many angels can you photograph through a pinhole camera aperture?
October 10, 2005
Pinky Had Ghastly Sweaty Dreams During a Nap
Pinky dreamed of giant deformed newly hatched birds. When he woke up, he was covered in sweat and laying on these two hatchlings. How will Pinky care for these awful creatures? Will they survive? Will they grow as large as Pinky? Will they take over Pinky's limelight?
Pinky Diablo: Better Than a Monkey
If you've been thinking about a monkey, look no further! Pinky D is better than a monkey. Monkeys carry germs, are expensive and don't really make good pets. Consider renting Pinky D for parties, flea-picking, or just to have around the house. Pinky's antics are as good as any monkey's--plus he makes an excellent travelling companion. He's always said, "Everybody loves monkeys!" Now you can love something better than a monkey. Call for reservations today.
Horrified Pinky Apologizes to His Fans
If you've noticed the ads to the right, you might think that Pinky chooses them. Not so! They are chosen by Google according to Pinky's blog vocabulary. Pinky promises (and you can verify this by looking in the archives) that he has never used the phrase vaginal discharge (until now). But for the past two days ads related to vaginal discharge have appeared. (Pinky realizes that by using the term vaginal discharge three times in this paragraph he is only aggravating the problem.) Pinky knows many of you have probably been taken aback by this while purusing this blog over your morning green tea chai latte. Pinky apologizes and is working with Google to remedy the problem.
Follow Pinky D's Path to Wealth: Rainbow a Crock
The myth of the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is simply an elfin ruse to distract you from the truth. Think about it--does it make sense to follow beauty to find wealth? No. Pinky Diablo is certain you need to follow the dirtiest, stinkiest, hellhole path you can find. Follow the smell of rotten meat--talk with people with decaying teeth and breath--wallow in sewage and drainage ditches. This is not only the path to enlightenment, but to the pot of gold promised, but never delivered, at the end of the rainbow. (and when you find it, make sure to give Pinky his cut.)Pinky Tries Teaching a Little Buddhism
Here's a small good deed in the name of Dungrath Sutabutra (the mother of a friend of Pinky who died this week.) Pinky emailed the local Buddhist temple to find out how to do something for a deceased Buddhist. Pinky and wife are going this Sunday, but also thought their audience could learn from what the monks emailed back about death:
Hello Pinky, Let me explain to you what is going on and how it works. When we do good things Good Actions Karma means action so when we are doing good karma and we generate right effort. We earn what Thais call boon or Merits. Dana is the pali word for the art of giving. So when you give food to the monks as they take only 1 meal a day, which they depend on the lay people for food, you in turn receive merit or boon. Now in order for us not to attach or become greedy in creating merit, we in turn give the merit away, or pass on our good will. Now when we have a loved one or a friend
that we lose to the cycle of birth and rebirth, it is a special time to do good things and dedicate it the effort to the ones we have lost. This passing on of
good will means a lot to someone who can no longer do good things because they no longer have a physical body to do it in. So this good effort will help to determine the person's destination rebirth--or in the case of a monk for them to reach nibbana and end rebirth. Pinky, you can come to the temple on Sunday and bring Alms food for the monks. The dish must be fresh cooked that day, or if you wish to make a donation of money that is fine as well. But if you participate in the ceremony of transferance of merit in the name of your friend's mother, this would be the best thing you can do to help her. Your good merit and what you do in her name will help her on her way.
The Monks must eat before 12:00 so if you come come at around 10:00 - 10:30 the monks will have lunch and after it is like pot luck and you can have lunch with the rest of the people. If you have more questions please e-mail me back.
West Texas Prayer Wheel
Meditate on this prayer wheel over a big chicken fried steak with gravy and you will soon be closer to Pinky.October 9, 2005
Miss Love Bashes Pinky but Suffers in His Absence
You have read the derogatory remarks Miss Love said about Pinky. Pinky's counter-claim is that if failing to clean under things is the worst that can be said about a person, sainthood is in order. (Honestly, do you think Mother Teresa cleaned under things?) Here is the meal Miss Love managed to prepare for herself while the Master (chef) was away.
Pinky's Prayer for Travelers
Pinky has several followers that will be on the road in the coming days. He offers this advice: Changing your undergarments at least twice a day will bring good luck. Greasy food helps keep your mind on the road. And finally, the more souvenirs you can bring back for your spiritual advisor, the faster you'll get to heaven.
Pinky Diablo Says, "Call a Spade a Spade"
It's either a miracle or it's not! The phrase similar to a miracle is a slap in the face both to the English language and the Pink Divinity that creates miracles.
Pinky Has Seizure at Chinati Foundation
At first Pinky thought he was meeting his Maker. He walked toward the hum of the pink neon. Then the seizure began. It was similar to a miracle.
The Way to Pinky's Heart is Through His Stomach
...or possibly through West Texas. (Notice how the butter is concentrated in the areas most affected by the latest hurricane. Pinky says this is similar to a miracle.) Pinky Sees the Marfa Lights
Pinky and his parents, Pableaux and Granny D, went on a road trip to Marfa this week-end. They saw the Marfa lights, which made such an impression upon them that they have decided to become the first family team of crypto-geologists. They are already planning their next expedition.
October 8, 2005
Under a Pink Thumb
I must needs do this fast. Everyone, this is the noted Miss Love, otherwise known as W.O.P. (Wife Of Pinky). The Master has taken Granny D and Pableaux Diablo to Marfa, TX for a Donald Judd Love-In. He announced proudly that they'd witnessed the beautiful, mysterious, and enchanting Marfa Lights, of which Miss Love has spent many, many nights longing to see. Of course her sciatica as well as her commuter job disallows her from such frivolous travel, but still she pines. Pinky describes the lights as appearing like someone's truck lights flipping on and off about a mile away. Hm. Miss Love is attempting to attach flashlights to her beloved zebus' bodies, but the duct tape won't stick.
Miss Love is finishing up her three-week sentence of housecleaning drudgery at present and must get back to it as Mad TV comes on soon. She'd like to share a secret about Pinky. Tell one and all: Pinky Diablo never cleans under anything.
Miss Love is finishing up her three-week sentence of housecleaning drudgery at present and must get back to it as Mad TV comes on soon. She'd like to share a secret about Pinky. Tell one and all: Pinky Diablo never cleans under anything.
October 7, 2005
October 6, 2005
Pinky is Away for the Week-End
If Pinky is in the desert, far from any computer, how was he able to post this announcement? Miracle or Mordern Technology? Pinky never kisses and tells. Pinky's Friend Crochets Last Supper for Charity
Pinky's Ennis friend, Nadine, generously offered many evenings of her precious time to create a beautiful crotcheted scene of the Last Supper for the local soup kitchen. Now the poor and afflicted can bask in fine art just like the rich folk. All other donations of high art would be welcome.
Pinky Diablo, Proud to be an Oddfellow
Pinky is a member of Waxahachie Lodge #80. Have you hugged an oddfellow today?
Pinky's Dream
Pinky woke up in the middle of the night and jotted down a dream he had. When he looked at his notepad in the morning he had no recollection of the dream. Is this divine automatic writing? A message from beyond? Pinky knows this is probably the key to unlocking the secrets of the universe, and yet again, he wasn't paying attention.Pinky's Ship of Fools Only Has Room for One
Pinky has always said, "A man is his own island." But in Pinky's case, he's the captain of his personal ship of fools.
October 5, 2005
Pinky Travels to Marfa, Texas to Show Prize Pig
Pinky is showing Pinky P.I.G. at the Chinati Foundation Rodeo in Marfa, Texas this week-end. He hopes to do as well as Miss Love did at the State Fair. (And yes, Pinky has several pets named Pinky. There's Pinky D.O.G., Pinky G (a goat), and the late Pinky C.R.A.B.)
Jealousy Isn't Always Green
Pinky exudes a pink aura when anyone moves in on his territory. If you see it, you better back off, Buster! Looks are deceiving.Pinky D's Winter Digs
Pinky is leaving soon to air out his winter pod. It's in a secret location in the mountains. He does his best thinking there, and he practices his pee calligraphy all winter long.
What Stinks More Than Pinky?
Very few people have been blessed enough to catch the corpse flower at its most powerful fragrance. Most bizarre to the general public is that when the flower is fully open, it emits the nauseating fragrance of rotten meat (hence its Indonesian common name ‘Bunga Bangkai’). The odor begins on opening of the inflorescence and lasts for about 8 hours. The flower typically stays open 18 hours to two days. The stench, strongest at night, is there to attract pollinators, thought to be carrion beetles and sweat bees in the wild.
Pinky Diablo, Obsessed with Death #87
Adipocere is a soapy, waxy, and in some instances, cheese-like substance derived from the fat and soft tissues of a deceased person or animal; it is a by-product of the natural process of decomposition. It may form in semi-moist or very wet environments, hence the relative terms of "dry" and "wet" adipocere. It can be a creamy white color, gray, or even a shade of tan, brown, or almost black. Early in its formation, adipocere gives off a pungent odor similar to ammonia, though this may be difficult to discern in situ due to other decomposition gases (cadaverine, and putresine, for example). Later, adipocere may be rank and cheesey, or sweet-smelling, or it have no odor at all. It can be heated to a plastic-like state, melted, clarified, or burned. Its consistency varies, from being gooey as with a mushy bar of soap, to semi-soft like with a young cheddar cheese, to hard and grainy, as with candle wax.
Pinky is Not a Fan of Stating the Obvious
God must not have liked all those ones He made down in South Louisiana and East Texas. In fact, Pinky thinks He burns or blows them down faster than He can make them.
Pinky's Parlor Con't
Granny D donated the furniture from Pinky's boyhood home. Now she has an empty living room. Pinky appreciates the sacrifice a mother has to make. Pinky's Childhood Parlor Recreated at the Smithsonian
Here it is underway without the furniture. Pinky attended the small ribbon cutting ceremony and cried, remembering with fondness the many hours spent lying on the floor watching Manix. Pink Ants in Your Pants
Pinky is like a little pink ant. He'll bite your leg then run off to find another picnic.
October 4, 2005
The Vatican's Dirty Little Pink Secret
The Pope answers only to one voice, and the Vatican would rather you not know what sweet little voice that is.
Pinky Diablo's Biblical Times Sour Dough Starter
As you've read, Pinky's family tree goes well back to the Old Testament. When his People were freed from slavery and led across the desert by Charlton Heston, Pinky's family had a secret packed away in the station wagon (or whatever they drove back then)--a jar of pink sour dough starter. Now the People didn't use leavening, but Pinky's side of the family had it. It was passed down through all those desert years, through the Dark Ages, through the Great Immigration to the New World and finally from Blooming Grove, Texas (which was named to make up for how it really looked). Pinky will give you a 1/4 cup of this age old bacteria. Now you can own a piece of history and start your own yummy family history.
March on America
Pinky is slowly conquering the United States. Soon there will be no blue or red states--only pink. South America is next. Then the Vatican. (Mr. Pope, you better sleep with one eye open!)
One True Thing
If one true thing can be said about Pinky Diablo--it's that he never procrastinates. You would be wise to follow Pinky's shining example. Pinky Makes Good Use of Orphaned Pet Monkeys
Pinky D has started a monkey rescue at his ranchette. Orphaned pet monkeys are rehabilitated, given excellent veterinary care, and then trained to be Pinky's personal escorts at public events. The monkeys carry baskets of flowers and petals and sprinkle them in front of Pinky everywhere he goes. Pinky adores fresh flowers and believes that everyone loves monkeys.
Pinky Diablo, Geographically Speaking
Here's Pinky in grand scheme of Texas. Warning: Pinky lives in the moment and doesn't promise he'll stay in one spot on anybody's map.October 3, 2005
Pinky Hates the Meat Industry But Loves the Meat
The pig wasn't too lucky, was he? (By the way, if you haven't read anything by or about Temple Grandin you should be shot.)"Embrace High Gas Prices," Encourages Pinky
In Pinky's effort to make people ignore expensive gas prices, all his gas station grease monkeys will now be wearing Hanuman outfits. Pinky also thinks this is a great way for Americans to learn about other cultures. $4.00 a gallon? Who cares?! $5.00? Bring it on!
Pinky's Turtle Tries to be an Angel
Pinky's turtle, Winkie, wants to be an angel. He has strapped little wings to himself and often suspends himself from his cage top. Pinky says, "Winkie, you can be anything you set your mind to." And Winkie believes him. That makes Pinky feel good.
Pinky Paints a Painting
Pinky put brush to canvas last night. There must have been a guiding hand from above for him to create such a touching scene. Another hand touched him afterwards and made him paint the scene after the lil' angel fell into the pit of viperous dolphins and was torn to shreds in a sea of red.
October 2, 2005
Llama Breeders are Swingers
Pinky was invited to the State Fair Llama Breeders Association Banquet this weekend. He flashed several hundred dollar bills at the livestock pens, and the llama people took him for a rich playboy. He told them he needed a herd for his yacht. Miss Love was not amused.
Try Pinky Diablo's Tapeworm Diet
Pinky's eaten 27 corny dogs in the last two days and lost 13 pounds thanks to his belly full of tapeworms. He is selling tapeworm larvae for $9.99 each. Remember, your body is a temple. (Due to postal regulations larvae will be send in a package marked candy corn.)
In the Eye of Pinky's Storm
Pinky's life is a hurricane, but he lives in the eye where it's nice and calm. It's everyone else that feels the gale force winds.
Of Course They Do
This is certainly a low point for Pinky's ministry. He will pray to become less sophomoric.Proof That Ghosts Do Not Exist
Belgian Ladies Love Pinky D
Pinky took Mevrouw Poenstoeffel (on the right) to Disney Land. She was delighted, but ran off anyway with Mickey Mouse (well, the pimply teenager that was inside Mickey).
Pinky Diablo's Cup Runneth Over
Don't cry over spilled milk. Nothing spilled is nothing gained. To the victor go the spills. A hard spill to swallow.
Pinky Keeps a Change Machine in a Suitcase for His Clients
That Pinky D will do anything to squeeze the last dime out of his congregation. And they give it gladly. October 1, 2005
Pinky's Award Winning Quilt Design
Pinky entered 73 different categories at the State Fair. He has heaps of blue ribbons. His quilt won Best of Show. It was entered in the No-sew Polyester Quilts category. But because of its Quaker-like simplicity and 30 minute start-to-finish time, it surpassed all of the other quilt entries.
Pinky Misunderstands Costume Contest at the State Fair
Pinky was embarassed this weekend when he walked out into the show ring dressed as Dolly Parton. He looked around and realized the costume contest was for the cattle, not the owners. However, he still won first place. The second place cow gave him a nasty look. Pinky just clutched his trophy tighter as his high heels sunk into the dirt. No one applauded.
Pinky D Hires Artist Assistant to Handle Tiny Detail Work
Pinky D once had a lovely human assistant who was invaluable. But Pinky has not found a suitable human replacement. When this young rodent appeared, Pinky put on his thinking cap and killed two birds with one stone.
Hard Rock Candy Mountain
(Just because Pinky is not a huge music lover doesn't mean he doesn't know a thing or two about it.)
State Fair of Texas Accomodates Handicapped
Diablo Inc. is sponsoring 52 commodo-carts for the mobiltiy challenged. Now fairgoers can eat corny dogs to their heart's delight and not have to worry about someone helping them to the bathroom. Dignity is Pinky's #1 mission. (Tip from Pinky's friend, Sista' Shoog: the restrooms in the food pavillion are the cleanest and are stocked with Charmin brand tissue.)
Redneck Noah
Noah and his family prepare for the deluge. The racoons, possums, cockroaches, armadillos, buzzards, and coyotes are already on board.
Pinky's Wins Best of Show at the State Fair
Pinky's enormous cherry pie won the blue ribbon at the state fair. Each slice of this slice of heaven feeds 275 people. Pinky feels that this is part of his ministry to feed the masses.
Pinky's Russian Exchange Student
Pinky and Miss Love's Russian exchange student, Ludmilla Verarosovitch, shows off Miss Love's Cubby at the State Fair of Texas. Ludmilla loved the corny dogs and was last seen on the midway holding hands with the butter sculptor.
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